Relationship 101: Do We Really Need A Guide For This?


So here’s the skinny folks. During the week I had received some bad news. The news wasn’t an earth shattering piece of news, but all the same it was still something that left me rather in a bad mood. On sister blog, I had wrote about a friend of mine who recently got married and within a few months, her husband cheated on her. She exhibited the typical response when she found out. She cried, she was depressed, hurt and oh yes…very mad.

As she pondered why he would do such a thing, it seemed that as though he was mad at the fact that she caught him and wouldn’t let the subject go. I thought at the time that that was rather insensitive of him, especially since she had caught him in the act and he automatically expected her to get over it in a day or two. I must admit that I had my own choice words waiting for him, but I held my tongue because I didn’t want to seem disrespectful. But oh…he was trying my patience.

Fast forward three months later, they decided to renew their vows. My guess it was her idea, but I digress. They renewed their vows and everything seemed relatively normal, until I called her on Wednesday and found out that he was back to his old tricks. Perhaps, he never stopped. What had me pondering as a young woman, how can someone do such a thing?

I remember the excuse he used the first time that she could him. “I was always like that from since I was a little boy.” Well, sorry to break in to you, but you are no longer a ‘little boy.’ You are supposed to be an adult. You are supposed to be responsible for your actions. Why try to justify what you have done with such a lame response?

So now comes the part why I decided to write this post.

I oftentimes find that a lot of people don’t take monogamy seriously. Like I said in a Facebook tirade, what is the point in getting married, if you don’t have any intention on being faithful? It makes me sick to think that you enter a relationship with someone and you think that this is something solid, only to find out that this person has betrayed your trust in one of the most hurtful way possible. I rather they not propose and go through all of the pomp and circumstance that goes into preparing for a wedding. Inviting family and friends to your special day all the way not knowing that this garbage is going on behind your back? No, not me.

In addition, I have realized just how bad it can get. Meaning, that oftentimes there is someone who knows about it, but won’t say anything because they want to stay loyal to their friend. That is a stigma that I would never understand. If you see your friend hurting their partner, why not step in? I mean, I get it the whole ‘mind your own business’ thing. But if your friend is bold enough to tell you what they’re doing and even go so far as to bring the person they are cheated with around you, say something dammit!

It’s sad that so many people get hurt because of one act. If you are not ready to be in a serious relationship and want to play the field, then don’t bother putting a ring on anyone’s finger. I am aware that love is a gamble, but I rather not gamble with the risk of contracting a disease, you because you can’t keep it in your pants. It’s not fair to you, to me, and the person(s) you are cheated with.

I am still amazed that with all this stuff going around folks still want to play Russian Roulette with their lives. Wake up, people! This is no laughing matter.

Now back to my friend. I don’t know what she is going to do. I hope she makes the right decision for her. I would like to think she would leave, but it’s not my call. In the end, it is her life, her choice. I am just a hear to listen to her when she needs me.

To read my post from my sister site, click here.  Love. What a concept


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